Archive for October, 2007

10-28-2007

JAC’S FIRST COMMUNION!!

It is with great honor that we are able to share with you the news that Jac received his FIRST HOLY COMMUNION. Fr. Mark did an amazing job of creating the most beautiful mass we could have ever dreamed of for Jac. Jac’s adopted Aunt’s Jessica, and Reeners flew in town to be with him on his special day. Jessica sang his song as the communion reflection and Renee coming from the Jewish tradition attended her first First Communion. Many friends gathered with us to celebrate with Jac and we were deeply touched. The community clapped for Jac following mass and many came over to congratulate him. Jac grinned as he high fived, shook hands and gave out hugs. One man asked if he could touch him on the head as he had always wanted to touch a saint! Brooke danced and twirled, Joshua and Luke beamed with pride throughout the service. It was a true celebration of Jesus in every way. We felt all of your wonderful prayers and blessings and are once again humbled by your generous heart as we are so blessed by our extended faith family! Attached are a couple pictures of the special day! Notice the proud siblings, and the way Jac is holding Fr. Mark’s hand! Two holy men together! Thank you for sharing in this special time with us in the way that you did! All ONE in Him!

 

Irresistible Revolution
by Shane Claiborne – Zondervan Publishing

Many joke with me that I attribute far too mystically the God-Deals that regularly occur in my life. Lately these seem to be happening on planes when the person who sits next to me becomees a god-incidence rather than a coincidence. On my most recent flight back from presenting at a youth conference, I was blessed to sit a woman who shared with me that she gives workshops to churches about the poor. We had a great conversation about the frustrations we both share when we hear the ever popular mixed message of the prosperity gospel (which is, of course, taken out of context). In contrast, the gospel message of Jesus Christ is quite different.

My new friend shared with me a book called The Irresistible Revolution . As I thumbed through it, I could not wait to get my own copy. In it, Mr. Claiborne shares a story of how he had wanted desperately to work with Mother Teresa’s missionaries in Calcutta , so he phoned overseas, only to have Mother Teresa herself answer the phone. Soon he was working among the nuns. One day he caught site of Mother Teresa’s feet. He couldn’t help but notice the severe deformity of them. He didn’t want to ask her, so he remained quiet about it. Later, one of the sisters asked Shane if he had noticed Mother Teresa’s feet. He, of course, admitted that he had. She voluntarily told him that all of the sister’s shoes are donated. When they are delivered Mother Teresa is the first one to go through the bag. She then purposely finds the most challenging, beat up, uncomfortable pair and takes them for herself. That way, no one else will have to wear them, and all other pairs will at least be more comfortable than hers. She takes the least ~ walking in the footsteps of Jesus. How many of us willingly take on the worst or least position, even crippling ourselves to do so? or rather are we tempted to seek the greatest for ourselves, not considering what that might leave for someone else. It’s easy to convince ourselves we deserve better, bigger, new, more! We don’t usually compare ourselves with those who have the less, but rather to those who have more than us, setting the stage for want. I asked her what she tells people who tell her not to give money to the homeless on the street corners who challenge that they will waste it. She said, “Who is she to judge what they do with the money that is between them and God. She wastes money everyday, on fast food, Starbucks, or another pair of unnecessary black pumps.” She went on to say that it is not for us to judge, but only for us to give. Amen sister!

Challenge Questions: How many of us are faithfully worshipping a homeless man on Sunday and ignoring one on Monday? Who are we following… Someone who tells us that more is better? Or someone who tells us we are to become the least? A woman with deformed feet or a preacher who tells us that we deserve wealth? Check out the book: The Irresistible Revolution by Shane Claiborne

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10-23-2007

Welcome to Our Perfectly Imperfect Home

I’ve recently written a few blogs about our special needs journey with Jac, and in doing so, someone commented on how peaceful our journey seems to be. I laughed out loud when I heard this. Anyone who has ever spent more than five minutes at our house or even around us knows the contrary. It’s hard to paint a visual, but if I tried, a few hours in our day might look like this:

Now, for many this sounds no different than life with small children and in many ways, it is, but there are a few challenges we face that we haven’t with our other three children. Jac cannot have anything in his room, or on his wall, no furniture, no clothes, nothing in the closet. In fact, we had to remove the closet doors since he was breaking them down, and we feared he would hurt himself. He would spend hours rearranging his bed until Brett bolted it to the wall. We are not sure how long it will stay like that; Jac has superpower strength comparable to Samson.

We are in constant worry that Jac will escape. He is a “runner” and looks for every opportunity to do so. He thinks it’s fun, a game, and has no fear of anything that could happen. Our family rule is that all doors have to be latched at all times. Once, when Luke let a friend in to play, he forgot to latch the door and Jac got out. I think we all have a heart condition due to those few minutes of the uncertain. It is a terrifying feeling to say the least. Those fears never calm. We are never free of them. We are on constant watch to try to keep Jac from harming himself. And as we try to clean up one mess, our distraction only provides a new opportunity for Jac’s curious nature, like pulling every book off the bookshelf.

We obviously don’t have nice things in our house. We won’t ever have a china cabinet, porcelain, a working DVD player on most days due to Jac’s obsession with buttons, or any furniture that could not be easily replaced or simply discarded ~ We didn’t really need that coffee table.

Unfortunately, we can’t protect Jac from his seizures, or from his constant curiosity. No, our day would not seem serene, quiet, or clean to most anyone. It is; however, blessed. Jac gives us the greatest gift in perspective. We constantly ask ourselves, “How important is it really?” “Is everyone okay? Then this is okay too.” “Did we really need that crystal glass we got as a wedding gift, or will this Dora cup really serve the same purpose?” Jac has helped us realign or value of things, and reinvest in what matters most~ people. When things get broken, they can be discarded, People are of irreplaceable value.

We hope you will come visit us! Our home is a giant toy box waiting to be explored. It is messy, cluttered, and imperfect, but it is full of love! You are guaranteed to be latched in and bombarded with lots of hugs, a buffet of fruity pebbles, a sand box made of detergent, and probably a glance into the “nudist colony” that occurs on a regular basis when Jac decides his clothes are just too cumbersome. Nonetheless, you are always welcome; we are blessed to live in a home, an imperfect one that is perfect for us, and when you come visit, if Luke lets you in, please latch the door behind you, sometimes he forgets!

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10-08-2007

A Beautiful Family

Tonight we attended a service at a Church in which I have previously had the privilege of presenting workshops. I loved this community from the first time I stepped

through their doors. The warm welcome I received each time was heaven-sent, like a spiritual homecoming, a “God wink!” I fell in love with each member individually and the parish collectively.

I told my family repeatedly about this special community and the profound impact they had made on me, like finding respite in the desert. They were life giving water, and they generously fed my soul in all the ways it had been hungry for.

The members had enthusiastically told me about the Sunday evening Youth Mass and told us to visit soon, so I couldn’t wait to take my family. Immediately upon entering, I felt the warm breath of the Holy Spirit that such places exude. The smiles that welcomed us were genuine, and a few familiar faces created an instant sense of belonging.

Attending Mass with a special needs child presents its challenges. Although Jac is the essence of holiness, he does not comprehend the rituals, traditions or the observed silence at appropriate times. Furthermore, usually when people sit, Jac stands. When the congregation stands, he lies down. If they are quiet, he is loud. And whenever music is played, Jac dances. Jac has quite the moves too (look out Dancing With The Stars)!! With his hands waving high above his head, he sways to the music without inhibition. In addition to Jac’s creative worship methods, our one year old, Brooke, is completely enamored by her older brother, Jac, so much so, that during this particular Church service, she tried to emulate his every move. Her spontaneous movements, followed by her own self applause created giggles from nearby congregants. Brett and I are overly conscious in our desire not to cause a distraction, and yet we fail miserably. Now, I know what you are thinking, and the answer is –no. No, they did not have childcare available during the service.

With that said, you can visualize how worshipping near our family might be a little unconventional; our hope is that we don’t inhibit the beauty of the worship experience for those around us, but that is challenging at best.

Following Mass, a friendly woman came up to us, leaned over the pew and said, “You have a BEAUTIFUL family!” We smiled knowing she must have mistaken us for someone else. I responded with a sincere smile and a truthful statement, “We are a mess!” She continued, “You have a beautiful family, and I was blessed to witness the love you have for one another tonight. Through you, I witnessed holiness. I experienced pure joy in watching you together, and with a gentle touch of her hand and friendly wink, she scurried away.

Could she be right? Could our worry about being a distraction actually be a witness to those around us? Could Jac’s spontaneous movement be construed as spirit-filled energy versus an irreverent display? Could the nonconformity of our family’s worship be seen as holy? Could Jac’s noises be seen as joyful?

I had been thinking that we had been a distraction, and instead, God sent a messenger to tell us that we were a blessing, reminding me again that we all have a place in God’s house. We did feel accepted, not only because of this precious woman, but also from the gentle spirits of those around us.

In reflecting on the experience of the night, the Church, the community, the people, the music, one thought kept coming to mind… What a BEAUTIFUL family! We look forward to visiting our extended faith family at St. Thomas More again soon! They truly are the epitome of a beautiful family!

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10-08-2007

The Manifestation of God through Special Angels

I had the honor and privilege of presenting a seminar about special needs children this past weekend in Dallas. It was the most emotional presentation I have ever given. I wondered why as I have presented many times about Jac and the topic of disabilities, but this somehow was different. I realized it had to do with the energy in the room. The overwhelming sense of compassion that exuded in the hearts of all present. Many families attending had children with a disability. One gentleman even honored us by bringing his son who has Cerebral Palsy. Matthew was a visual presence supporting the purpose in why we were gathered~ To pray, support, educate, encourage and enlighten.

Many shared their situations and others came with a sincere desire to learn more about a subject they had compassion for but not a lot of experience. What a wonderful gift they brought to the group in caring enough to be there and take interest.

I was able to share our own family’s journey with Jac. How he has been nothing but a gift from God, not for us to try to fix, but rather sent to fix us. I shared how it was Jac who gave us the holy perspective of living each day in gratitude for every single breath we are blessed to take. It is Jac who teaches us about unconditional love, a sin-free life and acceptance on every level. Jac teaches us about livingly humbly, only honoring that which gives life, one another, and the spirit that breathes in all of us.

I was given the gift of a mom coming forward and sharing that the day had changed her life. She realized that she had misjudged persons with disabilities as unfortunate, not holy. She told how she had misused words like ‘retarded’ with her own children, using it as slang in inappropriate ways and how from now on, she would not only change the way she spoke, but she would educate her family as well. She said she had formerly retracted from those who had special needs, especially if someone had touched her, and now she would handle that differently too, as if being anointed by one of God’s holy angels. With tears in her eyes, she said her life was forever changed… and thanked me. I knew it was not me, it was Jac’s message that was speaking, and I was only his earthly voice.

Another parent shared her own journey with her special needs child and how she too had gone through struggles and trials in her marriage relationship. She eloquently sited;
“Our “little selfish marriage problems” are nothing compared to what our child has ahead of him. I think in a way, the timing at least, was from God. We couldn’t be there for him unless we were together.”

Even as I write her words, I have chills. Through these special angels we learn to be selfless in a way that gives us the true perspective of what is important. These angels align us with God’s plan and purpose, not our own worldly ways. That is what these holy saints do and yet still often our society is blind to the gift of who they are…even tragically, aborting them.

I am grateful for all of God’s special angels and thankful for their holy purpose, plan and spiritual alignment with God. These pure sinless souls allow us to experience the manifestation of God’s love in the most powerful of ways!

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